Time to Help Myself

So, I thought I would blog about this since I don't have many blog followers and could get it off my chest. Well, Anthony and I have been having some problems lately, bigger then normal. We both have things we want to work on. I for one, need to start working on not being lazy.

I know that quite a few of our arguments stem from silly things like laundry not being done, the house being a mess... etc. I HATE cleaning. Not to mention that even when I set my mind to start doing it on a regular basis and getting into a routine, I look at everything and get overwhelmed. This of course, leaves me not wanting to do a darn thing.

I come from a family of people who clean like crazy and seem to actually enjoy it. What on earth happened to me? I have, for as long as I can remember, been a messy person. I always try to clean my house before anyone comes over. Afterall, I grew up in a clean house and nobody ever came over to a messy place. In fact, even though our house seemed to always be clean, we put in extra effort to make it sprakle before guests would come over.

Why can I not be like that? I absolutely despise cleaning but also do not like a messy house. Like a I said, the problem I run into is getting to square one (a spotless, fully clean house) to keep it up from there. Although, my house has been 100% clean a few times and it has never stayed for long. I try to blame our house itself for my problems. For instance, our laundry room isn't so much a room as a space just big enough for a stacked washer and dryer tucked away in the back corner of my bathroom (like it's own little dungeon). Who on earth wants to spend their days back in that tiny corner doing laundry? NOT ME! I also like to blame my SEVERE lack of storage space in my house for my cluttered counters, corners, tables, etc. I have also never been a fan of dishes and I am even less of a fan of doing dishes when we LACK a dishwasher!!!

Alright. The point of this post was for me to own up to my biggest shortcoming. I have now done that. I also felt the need to show you exactly what my house looks like right this second. I now feel that I have admitted to the problem. It is now just a matter of taking the steps to fix it. My dilemma, where to start? Where to get the motivation to start and keep it up? Why can't I just program my brain to clean?

Yet Another Appointment :)

So, I have another ultrasound tomorrow. I am excited to get a good view of our little one as well as hear that strong steady heartbeat! I am so happy to not be plagued with morning sickness 24/7 as I was with Aidan. It hits me every few days for a few hours then goes away when I head to bed :) I do not know how I would have coped with being sick 24/7 and going to school and chasing Aidan... I give a BIG pat on the back to those poor friends of mine who survived terrible sickness with their pregnancies and their toddlers!

However, this pregnancy is leaving me with the most awful taste in my mouth. As our friend Tracy put it, it tastes like POISON!!!! I have done some research and it seems to be related to an improper Ph balance in my mouth. It does seem that eating some sort of fruit helps to alleviate the problem. I learned very quickly that brushing your teeth, only makes it worse! (Don't worry, I'm still brushing my teeth).

So, I have seriously lacked any connection in pregnancy symptoms with both of my pregnancies. My greatly optimistic ARNP, Sarah, says that perhaps this means I am carrying a girl. Along with a few other friends. Did you notice a difference between pregnancies with different genders?

On another note, I am sort of freaking out. Aidan is going through this fabulous stage of MAJOR defiance and it is driving me up a wall. I am beginning to wonder if I will even have the patience to deal with a nearly 3 year old and infant at the same time. (Insert kind, reassuring thoughts/words here). I am hoping that this is completely normal. Kind of like cold feet before a wedding? I mean, I do still have almost 8 months to go, Aidan will get better soon, right? At some point my hormones will even out after the new baby. Oh boy!

One last thing, family. I am thoroughly freaked out by the fact that I am fairly sure I will have a huge lack in help from our family after the new baby is born (not because they don't want to, of course). I have heard from friends who recently had their 2nd child that their family was of great assistance the first week or two with two children in the house. Well, my sister is the only person who lives in town. My mom lives near Seattle (and a baby due in December means snow on the pass). My fabulous step mom lives in California and I think even if she wanted to be here, she just couldn't pull it off. There isn't a single grandparent of mine who I would want here to help with a new baby. As for Anthony's family, I'm sure his mom would come for a day or two but I don't see much more then that. Maybe I should bite the bullet in the next couple months and actually discuss this with them!

Then again, plenty of woman don't have any help and do just fine! I really think it is all of these hormones getting to me and making me fret over silly things! I just feel like having a second child is a new realm of motherhood, almost equal to being a first time mom!